Facilitate the opposing party’s custody. (say what)

If you thought it was your job to prevent the other side from exercising custody, you haven't been paying attention to commonsense or the law. If the other parent is fit, or a court has found them to be fit, then it is your job as a parent to ensure the child benefits from the love and companionship of the other parent.

Take for instance the Pennsylvania statute:

§ 5303. Award of custody, partial custody or visitation.

(a) General rule.--In making an order for custody, partial custody or visitation to either parent, the court shall consider, among other factors, which parent is more likely to encourage, permit and allow frequent and continuing contact and physical access between the noncustodial parent and the child......

Notice the bold part. The court is to consider whether you are the parent who will facilitate the other parent's relationship with the child. So you should bend over backwards to facilitate custody in the other parent. Doing otherwise is grounds to rule for custody in that other parent.

Many parents fail to realize that if they are viewed as obstructionist, they may have won battles, but they will ultimately lose the custody war.

So don't work to deny the child the other parent if you want to have and keep primary custody.

So what can you do to "facilitate the other parent's custody"? What does this mean in practice? Here are a few examples, assuming there is some level of communication between the parties...

1. When the other parent asks for an extra day, give it to them. Be flexible to accommodate special events and opportunities that they have for the child during your periods of custody
2. When your schedule makes a babysitter or other child care necessary, offer the time to the other parent, so they can have extra time with the child if they are available.
3. If possible make sure the grandparents and other extended family on the opposing side are invited to special events involving the child, and made aware of sporting events and extra curricular activities.

Doing these things will impress upon the court that you are not an inflexible parent who denies the child and the other parent extra opportunities.

Of course, if you are in a contested custody matter, or litigation is still pending, keeping track of these "extras" is important. Even making the offers for extra time, if they are not accepted is beneficial to your position in a contested custody case.